At a recent leadership event I was asked to give some tips and thoughts on leadership. I am no guru, but these are some thoughts that come from my experience of being a nurse and midwife for over 30 years.
Throughout those years I have worked in intensive care and management and leaderships roles. I ended my NHS career as a director of nursing and am now a government advisor. I have reflected on those roles and thought about what’s been helpful to me. Over the next few weeks I will share with you my views on this leadership topic. To start off I want to talk about mentors and role models.
Choose a mentor or two
I usually have more than one mentor. The best mentor I have had wouldn’t have used that term. She was a hugely experienced nurse and general manager, a State Registered Nurse and had no other paper qualifications. She was of the generation who wouldn’t have used management jargon like “mentor”. Yet she was the person who taught me most. She offered me some great opportunities and is the person I think about when I’m perplexed and ask myself “what would she have done?” She was interested in me, she reckoned she spotted some potential and gave me chances to develop.
My horizons were lifted and, because of her ambition for me, I think I achieved more than I might have done left to my own devices. This means that the mentoring relationship is not always cosy. You need challenge and difference.
It would be narcissistic and unproductive to be mentored by a clone of yourself, so seek out those who think differently (and act differently from you) and who are going to stretch and cajole in a safe yet stimulating way. You don’t have to agree with them all the time or follow all their thinking but you will need to ensure that it is a meaningful two way relationship – there has to be something in it for the mentor otherwise why should they give you their time?
Role models - and 'anti' role models
My role models differ from my mentors because I usually observe them from a distance and I don’t always have a personal relationship with them. There are those I wish to emulate, but on reflection perhaps more importantly there are the ones I don’t want to be like. They have traits I hope I don’t exhibit. I hate being late and being inconsistent. I hate transferring stress onto others and I want to support people, not criticise them when they have done their best. And I don’t, by any stretch, always get it right.
I know of some leaders who readily keep people waiting to emphasise their seniority rather than respecting people by being on time. Leaders who are stressed by their role and create a frenzy of chaos around them are generally going to be ineffective and not necessarily create a successful team.
And then there are those who are stunning role models who should be emulated. It’s always fascinating to me how they conduct themselves, dress, and speak. The best have such linguistic dexterity - they can communicate sophisticated messages simply for different audiences (and do it equally well verbally and in writing). If only.
I hope you can pull something useful from this blog and that it will inspire you in some way to seek out a mentor or identify a role model who will inspire you.
Next time I'll share my thoughts on networking.
Let me know if there is any particular topic you would like me to blog on by leaving a comment below.
And don't forget you can also join in the conversation on Twitter.